Top Ten Reasons Why Sean Payton Will Not Be the Head Coach In Arizona

Sean Payton is rumored to be coming to Arizona if current Cardinals head coach, Kliff Kingsbury, is fired.

Going with the parameters of the Miami Dolphins deal that was nixed by the NFL - a first round pick going to the New Orleans Saints (Payton is under contract 'til 2024) and 10 million per year - would seem to more money and draft stock the Cardinals would want/be able to digest.

But that would be too simple. Therefore, I give you Top Ten Reasons Sean Payton Will Not Choose AZ:

10.) Haboob Stevie sounds scarier than Hurricane Katrina.

9.) Sun visors are for those in AZ that are retired and/or getting fat on paychecks.(Wait, that a reason for not against.)

8.) Payton is only 5' 11'. No way he can call plays over his sideline assistant coaches in front of him.

7.) New Orleans has 15 different kinds of shrimp. AZ has only one.

6.) New Orleans has cool nicknames for the city, "Nawlin's", "The Big Easy", etc.. AZ has "That place where Hogans Heroes guy was murdered".

5.) Famous for developing a short QB(Drew Brees), was disappointed when he found out Billy Barty was no longer alive.

4.) Currently he works with Terry Bradshaw, Jimmy Jones, Michael Strahan and others. In AZ he would work with Dan Bickley.

3.) In NO, worked with Dan Campbell, Dennis Allen, Steve Spagnola, Marc Trestman and Doug Marrone. In AZ would may be working with some guy named Joe Grosso.(But with Bountygate at least they stay in the paper division with Spencer Whipple.)

2.) He's using the Cardinals for leverage in order to get a better deal with the Dallas Cowboys.

and the number one reason why Sean Payton won't be a head coach in Arizona is..

1.) He wants to be known as a winner.

<em>This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Revenge of the Birds' (ROTB) editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of ROTB's editors.</em>